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| i got leave and im goina bali woot woot. i swear i can see stardust around the boss when hes in a good mood.
sushi boy. so theres nothing wrong with this sushi boy. but i was reading psychology today mag (yes, there are psychology MAGS! loads of bs really) and it listed the reasons for rejecting commitment/ partner and possible solutions, and none of it mentions chemistry. think i bought the wrong magazine.
in other news, dexter called me sexy. and it was during work hours so he sure as hell wasnt drunk. its terribly confusing tho, but no, according to psycology today mag, dex is not a gooid choice and i should strike him off the list. and i did more than a year ago. but whats with the sexy?
and then there was pipe. in morocco now, playing a round of golf. his phone died and he couldnt hear me and i realised that my days are pretty empty when hes not around. and we ve done it for almost a year, and i dont know how to leave this. i dont know how to leave the pointless conversations and funny mmses. i cant leave nice dinners, warm kisses and watching broad shoulders come out of the pool, the weekend searches for milkshakes and 7am messages. i cant leave this companionship that i know i should.
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| BLAH. pipe is in french forests and i gave him commentary on the wimbledon finals. please come back now i miss you.
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| hmm. on my birthday i went to sakae sushi at cpf tower for dinner on my own. i go to sakae sometimes to remember poke and the gyoza, tofu, peas and sordid philosophies we used to share, but this particular branch overlooks the water feature outside capital tower, and at night its a strange mix of dead corporate reality versus cheesy japanese made evergreen standards.
so on wednesday as i played with my little yam moshi ice cream, i noticed a pair of curious eyes glancing over every now and then. very boyish eyes, and i could hear geek speak with an american twang. i thought, its my birthday and i should do something by which to remember it by (pls refer past entries for memorable birthday events such as getting the car locked in, etc).
turns out this curious pair of eyes is a pretty european boy, a well travelled bloke who spent 11 years in america. hes lanky, and hes got a frat boy way about him. i can imagine him in a polo tee and shorts, really. hes cute lah.
and thats it. hes cute.
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| sick feeling in my stomach today. the next year will be a turbulent one, but by this time next year, i would have tasted success, without losing myself.
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| yes i have felt at times like my entire life is slipping away from me, because i cant remember things.
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